Understanding my myself....

Sometimes I feel like a stranger to myself - not knowing myself well enough. If you post this question to me:

1. "What do you like to do, in term of job or career?"
2. "What do I foresee myself doing for the next 10 years or till the end of my career line?"
3. "If I'm given a choice to choose, any job in the world, what would it be?"

My answer will be : "I donno leh" then shrug

Not only in terms of job decision, in terms of personal life, I'm always asking myself:

1. "What can I do with my life to make it more meaningful or more happier?"
2. "I have seen people who is very contented with their life, knowing what are their dreams and making use of their life to fulfill their life's ultimate goal. What is mine?"

My answer to these aspect of my life remain unknown as well.

Sad ala pathetic kan?

I think this is the downside of being too in touch with your emotions and allowing them to take charge in my life. I know I need to balance my logical and emotional side of me, but very often I give in to my emotional side.

Like example, lately I attended an interview. I started to feel overwhelm with the fact that I may have to decide or make decision (something which I don't like to do, especially big one that can affect portions of my life span), but on the other hand, I get very frustrated and trapped when I'm left with no options. I know what my best pal will say to me at times like this...."you very char boh kan sin la" (means - you want something but when it comes, you don't want it to come...)

Oh well, guess I have to learn how to listen to the real thought within myself instead of emotions that run wild at that point of time....